"Lord my God, who am I that you should leave me The child of your love - and now become as the most hated - the one - you were thrown away as unwanted - unloved I call, I hang my turn, I will -. and there is no one to answer - no one to whom you can hang -. no, no one is alone ... Where is my Faith - even deep down is nothing, but emptiness and darkness - My God - how painful is this unknown pain - I have no confidence - I absolutely do not trust the words and thoughts that crowd in my heart -. and let me suffer the unspeakable pain So many unanswered questions are revealed anxious to - - live in me because of the blasphemy - If there is a God - please forgive me - When I try to keep my thoughts to lift to heaven - there's only one conviction void - so that these thoughts return like sharp knives and my soul hurt. I said "God loves me" - yet the reality of darkness and coldness and emptiness is so great that nothing touches my soul. I made a mistake in the blind task to the reputation of the Sacred Heart? "
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