I need to get rid of just now, otherwise I will explode even more .. .. by me to the word of the year crowned term is: PATIENCE !
If someone says to me this year, I must just have patience, he has great chances on the next day to be in the newspaper ... as victims of a cruel murder!
I can not remember when it started exactly but it must have been the beginning of January when I first well-meaning person I opened should just be patient, will soon be pain in the knees improve. To this I responded with even more peace and serenity .. with quasi-Stoic patience ... (Fact that the pain subsides I still wait by the way)
Also as in February, all that's left of my relationship still was in the breaks went out and someone told me to be patient but, a great wife I was not alone for long, I still thought nothing of it. When my ex-boyfriend later engaged two weeks pregnant and had his new fiancee, I was puzzled ... How was the patient? Am I doing something wrong perhaps?
That I'm for months running my supervisor with my lyrics behind without measurable success like I already mentioned no longer home ("Have you wait, next week I more time ...")
Then the knee surgery that I've been waiting half a year with severe pain ... ("Patience, the professor has a lot of appointments and business trips and ...") and now I sit here and listen to more or less a day for several reasons and several people I must be patient ...
wait patiently to be healthy, able to run on the right man for a good job on a new home, to coffee, to food, to me white not what not but seriously .. my nerves start to buzz when carrying out my ears or my eyes the hated word. Learned helplessness is spreading ... PATIENCE ... A trigger to get me to 180 milliseconds .... unbelievable ... I feel like a bloodhound patience ... gggrrrrrrrhhhh ...
course I asked a pleasure in self-pity of sinking, at least latently angry and also reflected man me what I done to deserve this and I remembered one thing: bad karma! !
I'm not the one that people put off until at some point to madness and the whole thing itself is quickly forgotten? I do not know how many people today are waiting for some feedback on my part about something. I'm not the man who has been delayed both in school and in studying some things to the last second? The self-Not altogether jokingly, "queen of procrastination" is the name? I'm at the end of such self-blame for the disaster?
Yes, the self-reflection sometimes brings things to light that one does not so much want to admit it .. and my guess is that my life I just want to pay back with a vengeance .. the years, more or less active deferred duties and avoided trouble. Now I get the all back.
And the moment in which to me is clear I think to myself: Where's my problem? But everything is ok. And takes an almost Zen composure worthy of me and I assume the state. I wait. And I imagine I would do it on purpose. The wonderful healthy defense mechanism of the turn from passive to active. Perfect. I love it. Coping can be so beautiful.
Until the next idiot well-meaning fellow comes and tells me something of patience ...
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